Alright, come here. Sit down for a second. Take a sip of whatever you’re drinking — coffee, Diet Coke, electrolyte water that you swear is going to change your life this week — and let’s talk like real women who are trying to build real businesses without losing our minds.
Because if you’re an entrepreneur, you already know this:
your biggest threat isn’t failure… it’s distraction.
Distraction dressed up like “opportunity.”
Distraction wearing mascara and holding a clipboard.
Distraction calling you at 9pm like, “Hey babe, quick question…”
And if you’ve been feeling scattered, behind, overwhelmed, or like your brain is a browser with 47 tabs open and one of them is screaming… welcome. You’re not broken. You’re building.
Here’s the lesson I learned the hard way (and I mean hard):
Only run the races you actually want to win.
Not the race that looks impressive online.
Not the race that makes people clap.
Not the race your anxiety signed you up for without permission.
Because you can’t win your race while sprinting sideways.
Do as I Say, Not as I Did 🤦♀️ (Because Whew…)
When SWAY was in the early days — the “baby business” stage — I didn’t just step into the comparison trap.
I moved in. Brought snacks. Hung curtains. Signed a lease.
I’d look at other companies and spiral like:
-
Why are they growing faster?
-
Why do they have a team and I have… me, a to-do list, and a prayer?
-
Why are their “launches” cute and calm, and mine looks like a tornado in a craft room?
-
Why do they seem so confident and I’m over here switching between “I’m a genius” and “I should get a job at the post office” every 48 hours?
And here’s the part nobody talks about: comparison doesn’t just mess with your feelings — it messes with your decisions.
When I was busy watching other businesses, I’d start second-guessing mine. I’d start chasing shiny ideas. I’d think, Maybe I should do what they’re doing. Or maybe I need a whole new product line, or maybe I should pivot, or maybe I should—
No. Tanya. Sit down.
But I didn’t.
And then… because SWAY was still finding its feet and I’m a grown woman with bills, I got lured into side hustles that promised quick money. You know the kind:
“It’s easy!”
“It won’t take much time!”
“It’ll fund your business!”
LIES. 😂
They brought in cash, yes. And I’m not going to pretend I didn’t need it — I did. But those side hustles came with a hidden price tag:
They ate my best energy.
They stole my focus.
They took time that should’ve gone into SWAY.
And they pulled money away from the business I was actually trying to grow.
It was like taking the scenic route because you think it might be faster… and then you get stuck behind a tractor on a two-lane road with no passing. (Small-town girls know that pain. You can either get mad or accept your new lifestyle.)
Looking back, I can say this with love:
Every time I split my focus, SWAY paid for it.
Not because I wasn’t working hard — I was. I was working myself into the ground.
But I wasn’t always working on the right things.
Here’s What Focus Actually Looks Like (In Real Life)
Focus is not some magical productivity fairy that shows up when you buy a cute planner.
Focus is saying no.
Focus is repetition.
Focus is boring sometimes.
Focus is doing the thing you already know you should do… even when you’d rather reorganize your pantry, redesign your logo, or start a whole new business because you’re stressed.
Focus is also hard because it requires you to tolerate the uncomfortable middle:
The part where results aren’t obvious yet.
The part where you’re doing everything “right” and it still feels slow.
The part where you wonder if you’re behind.
That’s the part that makes women start running races they didn’t even sign up for.
1) Eyes on Your Own Paper (Yes, Like 3rd Grade)
Remember when the teacher said, “Eyes on your own paper,” and you knew somebody was about to get caught?
That rule applies in business.
It’s fine to glance at trends. It’s smart to learn what’s working. But don’t let someone else’s strategy mess with your confidence. Half the time, what you’re seeing is a highlight reel with a filter and a caption that says “just launched” — and they’re leaving out the six months of chaos it took to get there.
Your business is your story.
Stop trying to write somebody else’s chapter.
2) Your Idea Is Not “Less Than” Just Because It’s Not Loud
Some businesses are loud. Big energy. Constant posting. Flashy launches. Big claims.
And that’s fine.
But your business doesn’t have to be loud to be powerful.
Sometimes the strongest businesses are built quietly — consistently — by a woman who shows up every day, does the work, and refuses to quit even when she’s tired and unsure.
Your job is not to look like everybody else.
Your job is to build what YOU are here to build.
3) Comparison Is a Liar (And It’s Also Exhausting)
Comparison will have you out here thinking you’re behind when you’re actually building something solid.
It makes you rush.
It makes you overspend.
It makes you pivot too fast.
It makes you chase quick wins.
And the worst part?
It steals your joy, and then it steals your focus.
I’ve learned that if I’m feeling “behind,” I usually don’t need a new plan.
I need sleep.
I need to stop scrolling.
I need to get back to the basics.
I need to remember what I’m building and why.
4) Focus Is the Cheat Code (Not Hustle)
We love to glorify hustle. But hustle without focus is just exhaustion with good PR.
Busy is not a badge of honor.
Busy is often a sign you’re trying to avoid the one thing that would actually move the needle.
Focus is what turns:
-
“I have an idea” into “I have sales”
-
“I’m trying” into “I’m growing”
-
“I’m stuck” into “I’m building momentum”
And yes, focus is boring sometimes because it’s repetitive.
But you know what’s more boring?
Staying in the same place for years because you kept chasing distractions.
5) Celebrate Your Wins (Even the Ones That Don’t Look Sexy Online)
If you wait to celebrate until you hit a huge number, you’re going to miss your whole life.
Celebrate the real wins:
-
Your first sale
-
Your first reorder
-
Your first “I’m obsessed” customer message
-
The first time you figured out a problem without crying in your shop bathroom
-
The first time you handled a setback and didn’t spiral for three days
Those wins matter. They’re proof you’re moving forward.
And you deserve to feel proud.
The Bottom Line (From a Woman Who Has Cried in the Shop Alone)
Building a business isn’t about being the fastest.
It’s about direction.
It’s about consistency.
It’s about staying in your lane long enough for momentum to show up.
And if you’re in the messy middle right now — the part where you’re working so hard but it still feels slow — I just want to say this:
You’re not failing.
You’re not behind.
You’re building.
So keep your eyes on your lane. Keep taking the next right step. And stop letting everyone else’s race rent space in your brain.
Now… go do what you do best.
And if you need to cry for 10 minutes and then get back to work?
That’s not weakness.
That’s entrepreneurship, baby.
Now go be fabulous — and focused -- and know I am cheering you on! 🚀💃🏁
